Desha's Reno of the Turks Fan Fiction

Chapter 89: Old Wounds

Two weeks. That was how long it took before one of their prisoners… a younger man, probably around Rufus’ age… finally broke. It had come as a surprise to everyone that it took so long. Apparently, their prisoners had been trained in techniques for enduring “enhanced” interrogation. The redhead was kind of glad he hadn’t been present for it when it had finally happened.

Unfortunately, that made it very likely that no one was going to be there once the Turks finally raided the hideout. That didn’t stop them from checking, of course… but no one was particularly shocked to find the warehouse over in Sector 4 empty and abandoned. The mercenaries’ leaders had evaded capture once again. Fuhito had evaded capture once again… as had Istev. No one on the team was happy about it… and neither was the executive board.

Reno, thankfully, hadn’t had any reason to be dragged along to help give that report… but judging by the expression on Veld’s face when he returned to headquarters later that day, it hadn’t been a pleasant experience. Since then, the Turks had been in something of a holding pattern, with Tres and Rude listening for even the faintest stirrings of another attack on the city or movement of the enemy and everyone else just sort of on standby, for the most part.

But from what Rude had said to him, it sounded like even though their hopes of taking the head honchos prisoner had failed, the Turks had been successful in routing the Wutaiians from Midgar. There was a rumor that, lacking manpower and with the city essentially on military lockdown after the second attempt on the vice president, they’d pulled out entirely, eager to wreak havoc elsewhere.

Where that “elsewhere” may have been, no one knew quite yet.

“Hey, Reno… pack a bag. You and I are going on a little trip.”

Reno glanced up from his desk to find Shay standing in the doorway of his office.

“Where to? Junon?” he asked, curious. A few of the senior Turks had been making the trip to and from Junon in the past couple of days… mostly advance security for the President’s trip there tomorrow. He wanted to see the heart of his military operations first hand, and after the incidents with Rufus, the Turks were taking no chances. Reno figured it was probably his turn to join in by now.

To his surprise, though, Shay shook his head.

“Nibelheim,” he replied, “And it’s a long flight. We won’t make it back until sometime late tomorrow or possibly the day after, depending on how long this takes us, so… bring a toothbrush.”

“What’s goin’ on in Nibelheim?” the rookie asked, getting to his feet.

“Nothing… yet. But it’s a target, what with the experimental reactor up there. Not to mention the research lab in the basement of the manor. Shinra has it heavily guarded of course, but since it is such a potentially valuable target, the executive board wants backups of the research and sample specimens transported back to Midgar, as well as some extra security devices and monitoring equipment installed at the reactor site. Hojo’s people are working on getting it all together for us.”

“Tch… You’d think that’s somethin’ they woulda taken care of a long time ago,” the redhead mused. Shay snickered.

“I don’t think anyone thought this war was going to go on as long as it has. I’m certain President Shinra assumed SOLDIER would easily take the Wutaiian capital in a matter of days and that would be the end of it,” Shay replied, “We’ve grossly underestimated the enemy, I’m afraid. Anyway… get ready to go. Veld wants us in the air within the hour.”

“Yeah, okay…”

Shay nodded and slipped back out into the hallway, and Reno couldn’t help but feel just a little excited. He’d never been to the little town tucked away in the mountains before. Heard a bit about it, sure… but there hadn’t been a reason for him to actually go there until now. Finally… the chance to check off another location on his planet-wide tour. He was still serious about wanting to see everything the world outside of the slums had to offer.

Even sleepy little mountain towns.

---

Tres flopped onto the couch in the lounge with a loud groan and rubbed his hand over his face. He felt like he’d been up for weeks. Really, it had only been about three and a half days since he’d last slept, but he was feeling every minute of it at the moment. Rude had finally stood up and outright demanded that he take a break from the reports and the interrogations. Tres had been too tired to argue with the rookie.

Not that he would have… Rude was absolutely right. He was going to burn himself out if he didn’t get some coffee and some rest, and not necessarily in that order. Besides… his protege could handle things for a few hours without his direct supervision. Rude was a good kid, and a damn fine intelligence agent, even if he did still make the occasional dumb mistake – like getting his ass electrocuted by enemy combatants because he tried to take them out with a goddamn sniper rifle at close range instead of a handgun. Tres had chewed him out thoroughly for that one. After he’d made damn sure he was alright, of course.

“Finally taking a break?” a voice queried, violently startling Tres from his thoughts as his heart leapt into his throat.

“Would you fuckin’ stop doin’ that?!” he growled. “For fuck’s sake, I’m amazed half the goddamn team hasn’t had a paranoia-induced nervous breakdown by now, the way you constantly sneak up on us.”

“My apologies,” Tseng replied… though Tres was fairly certain he wasn’t the least bit sorry. He never was. “You look exhausted.”

“Hmph… apparently Rude agrees with ya,” he said, shaking his head, “Little son of a bitch kicked me out of my own damn office.” He sighed. “Probably for the best, though. I can hardly see straight. So… how are you doin’? Haven’t see much of ya lately.”

“… As well as might be expected, I suppose, considering…” Tseng said, somewhat guardedly.

Tres nodded in understanding. It had to suck for him to be here but not really be here. To be stuck watching and not have the authority or permission to actually help when he saw the strain his fellow Turks were under.

“When’s your re-eval?” he asked.

“Another week,” the Wutaiian replied with obvious distaste. He sighed deeply and shook his head. “Do you know what the worst part is? No matter how many times I speak to… them… I feel as though I’m making no progress at all. Nothing has changed. Therapy is an exercise in futility, if you ask me.”

Tres snorted a soft laugh. “Always seemed pointless as all fuck to me, too.” He sat up slightly. “But… it’s not. ‘N we both know it’s not. You ‘n me both saw what it did for Kai after… well… after Alyssa.”

Tseng didn’t seem to have an answer for that, so Tres quickly changed the subject.

“Hmph… well, since I gotcha here, I did have somethin’ I wanted to talk to you about that’s not related to what’s goin’ through your head right now… if ya got a minute.”

“Of course,” the other Turk replied, looking up in curiosity, “What is it?”

“Rude,” Tres stated simply.

“Is there a problem?”

The Turk laughed and shook his head. “Hell yes, there’s a problem,” he said, “Asshole’s gettin’ too goddamn good at his job ta still be a rookie… that’s the fuckin’ problem. ‘Bout time someone put him up for promotion. I know I’ve kind of adopted him as a protege ‘n all… but rookies are still your department. Thought I better run it by you first.”

“You’re… already considering a promotion?” Tseng asked, sounding slightly shocked. Tres raised an eyebrow.

“Heh… Already? Kid’s been with us almost two years, ya know. Figured I better say somethin’ before that redhead of yours gets promoted before he does. Hell, after that save Reno pulled outta his ass with Rufus up in the copter the other day, I thought for sure someone’d already be plannin’ the congratulations party by now.”

Tseng somewhat awkwardly cleared his throat, but didn’t comment.

“Oh, come on… Don’t tell me you haven’t at least considered puttin’ your little prodigy up.”

The Turk lieutenant glanced away, clearly uncomfortable, and Tres frowned.

“Tch… What the hell, Tseng?” he asked, “Ya don’t think your pet slum rat’s earned it?”

The Wutaiian Turk narrowed his eyes at his comrade. “I’d prefer you not use that term to refer to him. It’s thoroughly derogatory, and it’s bad enough Rufus has a habit of using it. I may not be able to force him to stop, but I can certainly tell you off for it.”

Tres snorted loudly. “Only ‘derogatory’ if ya actually mean it as an insult. He don’t mind it any more’n I do if the person sayin’ it’s not bein’ a dick about it. But now you’re just avoidin’ the question.”

“He’s not ready,” Tseng replied, a little to quickly for the other Turk’s taste.

“Bullshit, Tseng. Bull. Shit.”

The Wutaiian Turk sat up more rigidly, a displeased expression crossing his face. “You’re entitled to your opinion… but he is my rookie, and I make that decision. Not you.”

“Yeah… Yeah ya do. But that don’t mean I can’t call you out when I think your decision’s shit. Just how much longer are you gonna keep him a rookie, huh? Another few months? Another year? You’re fuckin’ with his career, ya know. Bein’ promoted to full status is more’n just a gettin’ a new rank… or’d you forget about the nice little pay increase that comes with it? Or the bump in security clearance? The extended benefits? Or even just that extra little bit of self-respect you feel for makin’ it through with your sanity intact?”

Tseng scoffed and turned his gaze on the window across the room… but Tres wasn’t done.

“Ya know… Rude mentioned the kid’s still savin’ for a car. He’d get there a lot faster with the bigger paycheck you’re so casually screwin’ him out of. And just in case all that’s not enough reason for ya to do it… how about the fact that all that kid seems ta want outta life is for you to be proud of him?”

“… I am proud of him,” Tseng said, quietly.

“Then why are you intentionally holdin’ him back? You know he deserves it. And you damn well know he’d ready for it. If he hasn’t proven that to ya by now,he never will.”

The Wutaiian Turk deflated slightly, dropping his gaze to his lap.

“Look… I know you got a lot of shit you’re still dealin’ with right now. I get that. And I’m sure you think you’re just protectin’ him like any good mentor’d wanna do. But I’ve never been one to sugar-coat much of anything, and personally, I think this is a pretty dick move on your part,” Tres declared, finally standing up. “So… that said, I’m gonna go see Veld about the paperwork I gotta fill out for Rude, now. And then I’m gonna get some goddamn sleep before I fuckin’ keel over.”

With that, he strode out into the hallway, leaving his friend alone to think over what he’d said.

---

“So… Nibelheim, eh?” Rodney said as Reno was reaching for his newly packed travel bag. The redhead turned to find him leaning casually against the doorframe of his office.

“Yeah. What of it?” he asked, somewhat suspiciously. While he and the other rookie were on slightly better terms lately – a happy side effect of Reno’s rather dramatic rescue of the vice president after their flight was hijacked had been the bestowing of a sort of grudging respect from his rival – he was still a bit hesitant when it came to getting too friendly with Rodney.

“Nothing, really. Just interesting that they’re sending a rookie. I hear that big mansion is haunted.”

Reno snorted loudly and slung his bag over one shoulder. “Tch… that the best you got?” he asked, an eyebrow rising in challenge, “If you’re tryin’ to psych me out or somethin’, you’re gonna have to try a lot harder than that. There’s no such thing as a fuckin’ ghost.”

Rodney shrugged. “Well, if you don’t want to listen to a friendly warning, suit yourself. I’m just telling you what I’ve heard. Supposedly, Hojo does all kinds of experiments in the basement. Wouldn’t surprise me if there were an angry spirit or two roaming the halls…”

A hand very suddenly appeared from behind him and slapped him hard on the back of the head. Rodney yelped in a mixture of pain and surprise as Cissnei came into view.

“Will you just cut it out already?” she said, rolling her eyes.

“What? I’m just saying… that place is haunted as all hell. I heard it from a very reliable source,” Rodney insisted, rubbing the back of his head with a glare. “And quit hitting me, Cissy.”

“Quit calling me Cissy and I’ll consider it,” she shot back, grinning, “You don’t really believe in that nonsense, do you? Ghosts? Really?”

The other rookie merely shrugged again. “Can’t say I’ve ever actually seen one… but that doesn’t mean they’re not real.”

“Yeah, well… if I happen to run into any of the ghosts of Hojo’s former specimens while I’m there, I’ll let ’em know you’d like ta meet ’em,” Reno snickered, “But interesting as this conversation is, I gotta go. Shay’s waitin’ on me.”

“Wait! Before you take off, I had a favor I wanted to ask you real quick…” Cissnei hurriedly interjected as the redhead was pushing his way past Rodney. He paused and looked back at her. “Um… and I mean, if you don’t get the chance, don’t worry about it or anything. It’s not like it’s super important, but… if you happen to stop in Costa del Sol to refuel and if you have a little time to kill… could you maybe bring me back a bottle of rum? It’s called Sapphire Shoals, and they only sell it locally at the resort. It’s their house brand.”

“Since when do you drink rum?” Reno queried. Cissnei didn’t even drink beer as far as he knew… mostly because she was a little bit of a stickler for the rules, and had turned down Sato’s offer of a fake ID or use of his “procurement services”. The rookie blushed faintly.

“It’s… er… not actually for me…” she admitted, “It’s a gift.”

“For who?” he asked, his interest now piqued. Rodney looked more than a little curious as well. Cissnei hesitated a moment before practically shoving her fellow rookies back into Reno’s office and shutting the door behind her.

“You can’t tell anyone,” she whispered, “You have to swear you won’t say anything!”

Reno blinked and glanced over at Rodney… who looked just as mystified as he was sure he did.

“… Okay… I swear. What’s the big secret?” the redhead replied. Cissnei cast Rodney a demanding look.

“Yeah, yeah… I won’t say anything, either. I promise.”

Cissnei furtively checked over her shoulder, as if she were concerned that some shadowy figure might be lurking in the corner of the room before turning back to the pair.

“I… was taking some reports to Veld’s office a few minutes ago. I know I shouldn’t be eavesdropping, especially on the senior Turks, but… well… the door wasn’t shut all the way, and I didn’t actually know he was meeting with Tres, and by the time I realized what I was hearing, it was already too late!”

“What?!” Rodney demanded, “What’d you hear?”

A wide grin spread over Cissnei’s face.

“Rude’s getting promoted,” she replied, “Or… well… Tres was asking for the paperwork for his promotion, anyway. So… I thought I’d get him something. You know… for when he finds out. To celebrate.”

“That’s awesome!” Reno shouted, only to be somewhat viciously shushed by the female rookie.

“Shhh! It’s not even official yet, and we’re definitely not supposed to know about this!” she admonished him. “So you guys can’t. Tell. Anyone. Especially Rude. It would ruin the surprise!”

“No problem,” the redhead said, nodding his head in agreement.

“He won’t hear a word from me,” Rodney affirmed.

“And yeah… I’ll see what I can do about that rum. Can’t make any promises, but I’ll definitely try.” Reno could hardly contain himself. If anyone deserved a promotion, it was Rude. He’d been putting in just as many hours as his mentor lately, and the intelligence they procured for the team was invaluable. Rude was invaluable… and Reno was glad his friend’s mentor realized that.

“Thanks, Reno,” Cissnei smiled. “Oh, but don’t let me keep you any longer. The flight to Nibelheim’s a long one. You’d better get going.” She giggled softly. “And be sure to tell all of Rodney’s ghosties I said hi.”

“Heh… Will do,” Reno laughed as their fellow Turk scoffed and rolled his eyes. He then quickly made his way past the pair and headed down the hall towards the elevator.

---

Tseng had retreated to his office. It wasn’t as if he were needed at present, after all. Though Veld had not barred him from assisting with the the rookies’ normal training, said training had largely been put on hold. They were busy with the various tasks assigned to them.

Rude was all but running the intelligence office while Tres got some much needed rest. Rodney and Cissnei were being pulled in several directions at once, catering to whatever role they were required to fill for the more senior members of the team. And Reno… Tseng sighed softly. His rookie had been paired up with Shay to deal with the recovery of research data from Nibelheim. A minor assignment, really, but one that would keep him out of the city for a day or two.

Tseng hadn’t been pleased when Veld had informed him as such, either. After his unexpected disappearance two weeks ago, the Turk lieutenant would have preferred to keep his protege close at hand for awhile. But that was hardly an option. Reno was a Turk and Turks couldn’t just sit idle indefinitely. He had a job to do, and no matter how much his mentor might have wished otherwise at the moment, he couldn’t just stay in the safety of the office all day, every day. Perhaps back when he’d first recruited the redhead, Tseng might have gotten away with that for a bit… but now?

He leaned back in his chair and pressed his fingers to his temples, in an effort to relieve some of the building tension. He was going to have to accept it sooner or later. Reno wasn’t really a rookie in any capacity but official rank anymore. He’d been trying to convince himself otherwise ever since Veld had brought up the idea of promoting him, trying to justify to himself his decision not to even consider the suggestion.

His conversation with Tres a short while ago had made that difficult… if not impossible.

And that was because Tres had been right. The truth was, Reno was more than ready. Yes… he was still young and inexperienced. But that was no reason to prevent him from moving on to the next milestone in his career, and doing so was an entirely selfish act on Tseng’s part. He couldn’t even argue that he was doing it to prevent the young man from feeling suddenly abandoned by his mentor. That excuse might have flown back when Reno was still finding his footing and was unsure of the permanency of his position… but he’d gained a remarkable amount of confidence since those days. He no longer lived with the constant fear of rejection he’d brought with him from the slums.

No… the fact of the matter was that Tseng didn’t want to let him go… because letting him go would mean that he couldn’t continue to protect him in the same way he’d done for the last year and a half. Making Reno a fully fledged Turk would mean letting him out from under his watchful gaze and sending him out into a world where he could far too easily end up hurt or maimed or worse.

He’d failed to protect his sister… and though he was slowly coming to terms with that failure, it had opened up a whole other avenue of concern. What if some choice he made eventually cost him Reno as well? He hardly had a clear conscience in that regard, after all. He’d made poor decisions regarding the rookie in the past. And on top of that, there had been several Turks lost since he’d taken over as second in command… some of them as a direct result of his orders. It wasn’t that far-fetched to think that Reno might one day be yet another casualty of one of his deadly mistakes.

Before Mayu… he might have been able to live with that thought. For Leviathan’s sake, he had been able to live with it, or he would never have brought a goddamned sixteen year old on board to begin with. But not anymore. His sister’s death had altered something basic… something fundamental… inside of him. In the way he valued a life.

Tseng leaned forward, elbows resting on his desk, and lowered his head into his hands. How in Leviathan’s name was he supposed to continue on as second in command when the very idea of sending Reno… or any of his Turks, for that matter… into a potentially deadly situation terrified him? Left him a restless insomniac at night? Badgered him in his dreams relentlessly?

Oh, yes, there had been dreams, all right. Not constant, by any means… in fact constant might have been preferable. At least then, he wouldn’t be blindsided by it every time it happened. He wasn’t normally one to even recall his dreams in any significant detail. At best, he experienced a lingering emotional reaction upon waking. And to be fair, he still couldn’t recall specifics… just vague flashes of imagery and the deep-seeded terror he woke with, combined with the cold sweat and hammering pulse that told him that his sleep had been less than peaceful.

“… Is this a bad time?” a voice suddenly asked, and Tseng’s head jerked upright. He frowned at the unexpected visitor.

“Have you simply decided to forego the usual courtesy of knocking due to my current suspension?” he asked, slightly annoyed. Kai snorted softly and rested a hand on her hip.

“I did knock. Twice. And since I knew you were in here, I was, I think, understandably just a little worried when you didn’t answer.”

Tseng internally groaned. He’d been so caught up in his musings and self-pity, he hadn’t even heard it. Apparently taking his silence as an invitation, Kai strolled into his office and shut the door behind her. She took a seat in one of the chairs in front of the desk, and looked over at him accusingly.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” the diminutive Turk stated.

“I have not been avoiding you,” Tseng sighed, rolling his eyes.

“Oh, please,” Kai scoffed, “To be fair, you’ve kind of been avoiding everyone since Veld suspended you… but you practically run out of the room every time I show up. Which tells me that you and I need to talk. Probably about something neither one of us really wants to dredge up again.”

“… There’s nothing left to say on that subject.”

“Are you sure about that?” Kai pressed him. Her face softened slightly and she leaned in closer to him. “Tseng… it almost destroyed our friendship once. I don’t want to go through that again, and I know you don’t either. So let’s just get it all out in the open.”

The Wutaiian Turk was silent for several long moments, and Kai was uncharacteristically patient as she waited for him to respond. A last, he ran a hand through his hair and let out a long breath.

“I’m so very sorry, Kai… It was my fault she died.”

---

“So… ya ever been to Nibelheim before?” Reno asked. They were over the ocean, with little in the way of scenery. Shay had seemed only too happy to give the rookie the pilot’s seat, opting instead to act as navigator.

“Oh, sure,” the senior Turk replied. “Plenty of times. They began setting up a rather large project at the lab there about six months after I was first promoted out of recruitment… Hojo was traveling between Nibelheim and Midgar constantly, and there were lots of equipment transfers happening. I was on the escort team for one thing or another quite a bit.”

“Oh, yeah…” the redhead nodded, “I remember you sayin’ somethin’ awhile back ’bout how you got lost in the mountains around there with Tres for like a week back when you were a rookie.”

“Three days,” Shay corrected him, “Three very long days.”

Reno snickered and corrected slightly for an unexpected gust of wind.

“And those three days were probably the least painfulpart of that assignment,” the senior Turk added, “Tres and I really didn’t get along well at first. Being stuck on a mountain sort of forced us to work together.”

“How’d you guys end up lost, anyway?”

“… I hate to say it, but it was my fault,” he sighed, “It was our second to last day on assignment – or, rather, it was supposed to be – and we needed to check on the reactor up in the mountains above the town. It’s a pretty long hike, and the guide we’d hired had had a nasty fall the day before. But we’d already made the trip once on a previous visit, and thought we’d be fine with just a map. I… accidentally left said map at the inn. We didn’t realize it until we were already hopelessly turned around.”

The redhead laughed. “Bet Tres was real happy when ya told him that.”

“I was quite certain he was going to throw me into the nearest gorge and leave me there, yes…” Shay chuckled.

“So what’s the place like? Anything interesting to do?”

“Well… there’s the tavern, I suppose. And the mountain trails, of course, have some lovely views. But it’s really just a small town. Not a tourist destination. That’s part of why Shinra chose it for a reactor site. It’s out of the way, not especially easy to get to, and not very noteworthy even if you bothered. If you’re going to spend time and money traveling to out of the way locations, Icicle Inn is much more entertaining.”

“And freezing…” Reno said with a slight shudder. He still clearly recalled the bone-chilling cold of the little northern continent town.

“Well, when you go in the dead of winter, sure,” Shay replied, snickering, “You should visit in the summer, though. It’s utterly breathtaking, and some of the best skiing on the planet. Estefan goes every year at least once… and usually tried to talk me into joining him as some point. I was never very good at it, though, to be honest.”

“Estefan… that’s your brother, right?” Reno clarified. It had been awhile since the subject had come up, and he wasn’t quite sure anymore.

“My elder brother, yes. First born and the family golden child,” Shay replied, rolling his eyes. “Oh, don’t get me wrong. I love him dearly, but he can be a bit… insufferable… even at the best of times. And it certainly doesn’t help that Mum and Dad cater to his every whim. I was always a bit of a disappointment in their eyes after I turned down a position in the family business and joined the Turks.”

“Not big on the idea, huh?”

“That’s putting it mildly,” Shay snorted, “They were perfectly supportive of me joining the recruitment program… at first. Personally, I think they truly believed it was just a phase. I’d eventually come to my senses and realize I was too good for it. But the longer I stuck with it, the less pleased they were. Mum actually cried when I told her I’d been promoted to the Turks. And not because she was so very proud of her little boy.”

“Ouch…” Reno replied, cringing slightly.

“Mmm… I’ll admit. Their reaction did give me second thoughts about accepting.” He shook his head and sighed. “But in the end, I decided that it didn’t matter what they wanted. It was my life, not theirs, and I wanted to do something that mattered. Sitting at a desk, going over sales figures all day has never appealed to me.”

“Were they pissed they couldn’t talk you outta it?”

“More resigned, I think. Now had it been Estefan who’d chosen to offer himself up to Shinra Company, I suspect they’d have forbade it outright,” he smirked slightly, “Being second born does have an advantage or two. I’m somewhat more expendable than my brother. It gives me a bit more freedom.”

Reno blinked. “Uh… expendable?” he queried, not quite sure what Shay was getting at.

“Oh, I’m not saying they don’t care about me. Certainly, they’d be absolutely distraught if anything ever happened to me, but… well… I’m the spare, after all.”

“The… spare?” the redhead repeated, furrowing his brow. People had “spare” kids?

“You know… an heir and a spare?” Shay pressed. He paused a moment, considering. “Then again… maybe you’ve never heard that phrase. I don’t suppose it would have much meaning down in the slums…”

“Tch… yeah, you’re gonna have to explain that one.”

Shay leaned back in his seat and snickered. “You’re probably going to think it’s simply awful. But, in certain classes of society, it’s fairly common practice to adhere to the idea that one should produce at least two sons, so that if something, Holy forbid, were to happen to the first born… the heir… there would be another to carry on the family name, inherit the family property, continue the family traditions, and so on. The spare. That would be me.”

“… Wait. So… you’re tellin’ me rich people have backup kids just in case the first one gets eaten by a behemoth or somethin’?” Reno asked, incredulously, and Shay began to laugh.

“Well, when you put it that way, it does sound a little ridiculous… but essentially, yes.” He spent the next several seconds trying to sober himself before continuing. “It’s just a way of ensuring that the lineage continues. Haven’t you ever noticed how protective President Shinra is of Rufus? Rufus is an only child. No spare. If something happens to him, there’s no one else in line to take over the Company… It would fall into the hands of the executive board. Rufus is his legacy.”

Reno shook his head and returned his gaze towards the ocean that stretched out in front of them. He could just barely make out the dark strip of land that was the western continent.

“Man… Rich people are fuckin’ weird,” he said, vaguely disturbed by the whole idea, and Shay grinned.

“Not weird. Just… different. If there’s anything my time in the Turks has taught me, it’s that different people have different priorities. Take the two of us for example. Where would you put… say… the importance of food, on a scale of one to ten.”

“Tch… at a ten. Hell, maybe an eleven. You don’t eat, ya die.”

Shay nodded. “Now, see… I’d put it maybe closer to a six or a seven. But then, I’ve never had to wonder where my next meal was coming from… or if I could afford to eat at all. You have. Different circumstances create different priorities. That’s why Tres and I didn’t get along at first. It took me far longer than it should have to start to understand that.”

“Yeah… okay. I get what you’re sayin’,” Reno replied. It was something he felt as though he knew… but had never consciously acknowledged. He grinned again and looked over at Shay. “But I still think the whole backup kid thing is really bizarre.”

The senior Turk only shook his head and quietly snickered in response.

---

“I… think that’s the first time you’ve ever admitted that to me,” Kai said, a vague look of shock etched on her features. Tseng looked away.

“I think it’s the first time I’ve ever admitted it to myself, as well.” He hesitantly looked up at the woman. There had been a time when he and Kai were extremely close. Over the years, that friendship had cooled considerably… and he could trace it back to a single event. A single mistake. “If I could have taken her place… I would have. If I had seen any other option, I’d have taken it. Sending Alyssa was the best chance at saving the rest of us… but that doesn’t absolve me of her death. It was my decision… my fault… no matter how I’ve tried to justify it in the past.”

Junon. Five… almost six… years ago. Veld had only recently taken over as commander… and Tseng was newly minted as his second. It was the first real test of his ability as a leader. The Junon underwater reactor had just been brought online two week prior, and several members of the executive board, the military, and the press were touring the facility. And, of course, the Turks were there for security. Tseng’d taken the lead and brought Alyssa with him as backup along with Kai and two others.

And when something had gone wrong… when a flaw in part of the structure had buckled under the pressure of the water and the pumps had failed and underwater causeway had begun to flood… he’d ordered the young Turk to make the long run up the tunnel to the first emergency bulkhead, and seal it off before the flooding spread to the reactor. Had he been able to do so himself, he gladly would have. But at the time, his leg had been broken in several places after the initial collapse. One of the dislodged support beams had grazed him as it was pushed inward… but it had been heavy enough and moving with enough force and speed, that even a glancing blow might have been fatal had it stuck him somewhere more vulnerable.

Meanwhile, Kai and the other two members of the security detail had been topside, waiting to escort the second group down. Tseng, five high ranking Shinra employees, the base’s second in command, and at least a dozen reactor workers found themselves trapped in the reactor facility for nearly twelve hours before they could be safely extracted. Alyssa hadn’t survived the order he’d given. He’d known she likely wouldn’t when he’d given it, and so had she… but if she hadn’t sacrificed herself, they all would have died, and the reactor would almost certainly have been rendered inoperable to boot.

Twelve hours, stuck on the ocean floor and having to deal with the pain of both injury and loss. Twelve hours of trying desperately to keep those he was responsible for calm when they couldn’t even contact the base to tell them that they were still alive. Twelve hours before he could break the news to Kai that her lover was dead.

They had been the longest twelve hours of his life.

But worse still had been the devastated look on Kai’s face when he’d finally been able to tell her what had happened. It had been followed by pure, unadulterated fury… most of it directed squarely at him.

“I didn’t understand your pain,” he said, quietly. “I thought I did… but I didn’t know anything could hurt that much and not utterly destroy a person instantly. I’m sorry that it took experiencing it for myself before I could even begin to grasp what I did to you.”

“… I’m sorry, too. I wouldn’t wish that kind of pain on my worst enemy… let alone one of my best friends.”

Tseng managed a faint smile in spite of himself. “I’m not sure we’ve been what anyone might consider ‘best friends’ in a very long time…”

“Hmph… No. We probably haven’t been,” Kai replied with a somewhat sad chuckle, “And that’s mostly my fault. I said I forgave what you did… and maybe I even did forgive it to some extent… but I just couldn’t let it go. Not completely. Maybe it’s time I finally did.”

“Kai…”

“You’re still my friend, Tseng. And seeing you like this… a part of me thinks maybe you deserve it. But a much bigger part of me is disgusted with myself for thinking that. Alyssa’s gone, but you’re not… and I don’t want you to go anywhere any time soon. So I think it’s time to leave the past in the past… for both our sakes.”

“So… Where do we go from here?” Tseng asked, somewhat at a loss.

“For starters… why don’t you tell me how you’re really doing?”

~end of chapter 89~